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Geez it’s been a while. The other day when Han was staying over & I demanded for all the pics that we took using his cam. Mana tau, he saved then in cr2 file and wtf my photoshop can’t read cr2 file & i don’t have the converter software & wasted 1 day for doing nothing/waiting for download/angry for no reason zzz.

BUT baby came into the rescue once again and like ‘nah, give you this software. try & see’ over msn and zzz it works!

The pictures below were taken wayyy back last year. One of our usual A&W sessions.

“And there’s a shameless crazy girl imitating my fehmes big mouth pose.”

“She ordered a waffle. Sheesh, only one. Stingy.”

How can anyone destroy my waffle liddat?! T_T

Root beer, the only beer that I can drink.

Still ribbit hungry.

Fin.

*Update. This post is written in memories of the late Kermiu whom sacrificed itself to be the laughing stock & his soul rest in peace on the 23rd December 2009 in an accident. He was unconsciously & drunkenly hit a tree somewhere near Shah Alam. Your presence, smile & weird habit of sun-tanning in the car will live in our mind forever. Lovess.

Talking about the most memorable date night (s) that I’ve ever been?? Lots! I am blessed to have a very loving boyfriend, who can cook and tahan my tantrum at the same time.

I’m a pretty simple girlfriend la. You don’t have to spend so much of money for dinner or bring me to the nicest place for that special date to impress/make me happy. Usually, food at hotel buffet doesn’t taste as good as the RM2.40 loh mee. Just that you’re paying so much of money for the environment or whatever name that the hotel/resort brings. In short, YOU’RE PAYING FOR THEIR FREAKIN’ BRANDING!

One of my fave date night with baby is our 3rd year anniversary dinner. I wrote it before but sajer la wana write it again ok? Kekeke.

wtf just checked and baby didn’t save my pictures into the new HD. FML MAX!

Anyway, why I like this date is because

1. The food was dirt cheap & super good.

2. The place was nicely decorated & romantico.

3. Roses! Pink one sumore!

Actually, I knew that he was going to give me roses that night. Cos I accidentally read his text and the floral person asked him ‘pink roses can ka?’ & he was damn pissed that I ruined my own surprise.

4. The ultimate surprise was

MYBDAYCAKE A cake to make me fat xinfu.

And the one and only picture with the two of us

So susah ada SLR. Too huge to camwhore and don’t have personal paparazzi photographer to capture our every moment pfah!

And the day ended with lots of happiness, walked by the seaside, good food, manjafying and crazy dance to ‘Blame It’.

Ever since then, hanging out with baby just doing nothing will make me happy. The simple joy of love, simple warmth of comfort is from the way you look at me.  Cuddle, hugs <3

Have you watch the trailer for this movie? Damn cunted right? The first time I watched it, I was like… damn a must watched movie! Be sure to catch it. Hope to get free tix for this post )

Ohmy.

Was really surprised glad finally that we (as in me + Elias. eh wait i got an idea. if we were to hangout will we be Mel + Elias = Melias? hahaha. not indicating anything lol. just being my lame self) hang out together with  Jemuel and Ee Wei, both are Elias’ coursemate. and i was wondering how am i gonna fit into the group when i talked to them less than 5 sentences way back in our ums years.

Anyway, it was a fun day out. Kena poked fun. Became laughing stock as usual. Compared salary. Mine the lowest la. All those banking people salary damn high but I wouldn’t trade what I love doing for a high salary yet. Nevermind, I’m a fresh grad. Collect experience sin *comfort self.

So we went kai kai at Pavilion *yawn.

And we entered PB. Walked one round. Saw some few pieces I like and kept it to myself.

Then I joined the boys. Ee Wei damn funny la. He likes this piece and he asked Elias to try it. Very de funny guy.

Found anything that you like?

Yeah, it’s at this section…

Where?? Show me!

*Brought him to the section

You liked this piece neh…

Myself: Fuck.. how he knows arh?

Go try la.

Myself: If I try and I’ll like it means…. money flies

So I went and try.

And I fucking love it.

Elias said it is too sexy to wear in lrt wtf.

Jemuel say I can go Hawaii with this dress already double wtf.

But I didn’t buy it.

Cos it was super ex!!!!

Okay la although it was ex but still it is worth the price *wtf comfort self

Then we went out and go kai kai.

The dress is your calling.

wtf why i got guy friend like that one *wailing

Then we simply walked around and ended up at PB again.

Memang got yuan fen la. Maybe that dress is meant for me *wtf this is so not comforting self. this is going towards….

But I didn’t enter.

Go to other shops. Nothing for me. well, that’s cos i kept thinking about that friggin’ dress!!!

Okay lor… ended up going back to PB.

I straightaway grab that dress and to the counter. NO questions asked. NO comment pls. I am finally coming to my senses that I should be buying this dress.

wtfwtfwtf

And then I calculated. Okay this means for 6 weeks I have to eat oats. Can’t spend money jor.

But I won’t post the pics here. Cos I don’t want to do injustice to the pretty dress.

Fin.

11.45pm

I lay down on my bed, hugging zhumao & bucuk tightly. Thinking about the things that I was supposed to do over the weekend but I didn’t. Disappointed with myself.

The week passed to fast to breathe in.

I called him and he was busy. We talked a while but I didn’t mention what was really on my mind.

So we hung up and I hugged them lagi tight. Last week at this time… what I was doing?

Hanging out/supper with the part-timers after work at  Gurney Drive. Had this MUST EAT rojak which Soo Ai recommended. i had it ever since i first tasted it

12.05am

Tears started rolling.

I’ve been so patient for the whole day not disturbing his guys day out. And now it’s after midnight still not enough to lepak?

Not that I wana stop him from going out but… at this time when I need him the most. I just wish that he would make me feel wanted.

Not just call to update me about his whereabouts. Not just saying ‘I love you. Muacks’ at the end of every phone call just cos it’s a thing we always say.

I just want to hear you say you love me and really mean it.

By that time I started to send him some really nasty text cos I was angry that he wasn’t with me when I needed him the most.

No point changing to digi.

Fuck off.

I will be gone. Ja.

And then I switched off my handphone.

I really tak tahan why I need to suffer, miss him like hell. What am I doing with my life?? I’m freakin’ 24 this year. I am supposed to have the time of my life. Chasing my dreams.  Do the wildest craziest thing. But over the weekend, I just stayed at home and locked myself in the room.

I didn’t feel like meeting anyone. I didn’t feel like talking to anybody.

I onlined/blogged/FB/read/eat = chocolate/biscuits yepp, that’s practically what i ate on saturday

That’s why in my previous blog I wrote that my condition right now is WAYYY worst that UMS. At least back in UMS, I was eating proper food.

12.15am

He called. We argued/cry/he brainwashed me/i cried even more

for that 45 minutes, he was practically brainwashing persuading me. To move to Penang and live together.

I hesitated. Cos I am not ready to move in with him. I worried if it might damage than do good to our relationship.

Okay okay… I really do want to be with him. But I just can’t… i just can’t…

If I were to move to Penang,  I basically am giving up my career. My future. I’ve never done anything like that. Especially for a boy.

What makes you think that you won’t get a good job in Penang? You have Intact Group. Nuffnang.

Yeah, but how fucking sure are you that I’ll get a job in either of this company?

Then he said, let’s work in Singapore by end this year.

That time lagi I pening kepala. I’m not sure if I can get a job in Penang now you’re asking me to find a job in Singapore??

The conversation ended with a lot of sighing. A lot of ‘I need time to think it through‘ and a lot of ‘I need to sleep. Working tomorrow.’

6.15am

Woke up WAYYY earlier than the time I set. Bersemangat cos I made up my mind. I realised this year I didn’t make any new year resolution and now am making one.

Finally, I’m ready to take charge of my life.

7.05pm

I told you. Every time after work, I feel like I should stay in KL. My job opens up so many learning opportunity which I’m yearning of. Can’t just throw it all out of the window just for a boy.

I just woke up. Hearing the cheers from Stadium Merdeka reminds me of how the boys cheered during  football match in ACS.

This weekend was mostly spent melayan my emo. Everytime I wake up, I’d think… Last week at this time… I miss him. I really do miss him. And every time I’m like this, I have the thoughts of going back to Sitiawan or transferring to Penang.

Just say, if I go back to Sitiawan. I work there, spend less and be happier. Cos I’m always homesick and I miss Matthew so much. He’s growing so fast that I wish I had the chance of watching him grow. Then again, I could foresee. If I were in Sitiawan, I would say that the life there is boring, my job wouldn’t be as challenging as my job in KL, wana be adventurous la bla bla *sigh

But if I get a job in Penang, first thought would be yay, got boyfriend to teman me all the time. Won’t be lonely at all and, and… I couldn’t think of anything jor zzz. But then right, in the first place, one of the many reasons I didn’t find a job in Penang is because I wana test our relationship. See if it is strong enough to withstand the distance. And another reason is I want baby to have his own life. Like he can do whatever he wants, go out with his friends etc. Well, that applies on me as well la.

Sigh, sometimes I also don’t know what I want. Wana be independent also me, wana bermanja also me-_-

Anyway, all this has nothing to do with my relationship with my job. It’s fun at times, challenging at times and paling best is it’s very de social media oriented *woots

Aarghhh, it’s raining now and I’m so de emo-ing again.

Psst. Sometimes I can’t wait to go back to work cos I don’t want to ber-emo anymore. So depressing la talking to myself. Listening to my conscious fighting amongst themselves. And eat sucky food cos I wana save money. Sigh, my condition now is WAYYYY worst than my life in UMS. Although that time I was away from home, still I got him to bitch about my day and friends to gila with and freaking go to the beach whenever we want!. But now, everybody is all so busy.

One of my favourite place in campus. The library. Got aircond and that’s me wearing my pajamas. Don’t know what I was doing. Probably reading somebody’s blog. So intense one my reaction.

Tata.